Here are the next set of techniques I have used to aid in sexual healing. If you haven’t read part 1 which is the overview and part 2 which includes the techniques of womb connection/sensing, self-touch and womb wisdom then head back to them now.

4. Power Exploration

The reason power exploration comes after womb wisdom is that part of healing is learning to trust ourselves and express ourselves. Often after sexual trauma or wounds, the mechanisms for setting our boundaries and expressing them in a healthy way gets lost. It takes time to trust what we feel and learn to speak that and take action for it.

This needs to be practiced, not only in our sexual experiences whether alone or with a partner, but also outside of sexual experiences. When we explore our power in friendships, in interactions with strangers, with family, we exercise a skill that is often fractured when we have experienced something painful or traumatizing. If boundary setting is especially difficult for you, start small. With the foundation of womb wisdom, which is essentially getting used to hearing our inner knowing and then actually listening to it, we can start to express it in all our interactions.

Here is an example for you, try it out. You are talking to someone you have some negative feelings towards, lets say a family member you do not get along with. They want you to do something that you do not want to do. Normally you go along with it, for any number of reasons. Your womb space is telling you no, you feel it. So this time you aren’t going to ignore it. This time, you say “you know what, I can’t do that. I am going to have to say no this time.”

You do not have to explain it, you don’t have to convince them that your why is valid. You can just say no. If they are unhappy about your response that is ok. You are honoring yourself. Honoring yourself means no more compromises that hurt you, trigger you, make you feel uncomfortable or put you in situations that you are not ok with.

Now, let’s say you want to explore your power sexually, you are feeling comfortable to try something new, this will expand your power and your inner strength in a big way! It can be anything you are drawn to, the key here is what you want. Maybe it is a toy, or maybe you want to buy yourself something sexy and wear it under your clothes, knowing you are the only one who sees it. Perhaps there is a kink that you are curious about. Maybe you want to try flirting with the person at the coffee shop….

What can happen when you begin to push the limits of your power, when you begin to expand what you think you can do and what feels right to you, is that you begin to take back your power and step into your true self. When you are doing this from an authentic place it can be incredibly healing and can help build up your self-worth. Having a strong sense of self-worth means you can better express yourself and the power you have.

5. Orgasms for Healing

Yes, finally we have arrived. Orgasms create and move energy in our bodies. What happens if you use that energy for your own self-healing?

In my practice this has been essential, and it may not look the way you imagine. Start by doing this alone when you are self-pleasuring and are fully present in your body. The orgasm can bring about emotional responses and emotional releases. If this happens, honour them. Hold space for yourself and be kind to what arises. Send forgiveness to yourself or others and send appreciation to your body.

Try this: when you feel the rise of the orgasm, the build up increasing, keep breathing, continue to enjoy it. When the orgasm happens, try to draw inward the energy of that orgasm. Try to hold it and take it deep within your body, even sending it to specific areas you feel healing is needed. You can even set the intention as you self-pleasure, that the orgasm is in honor and in support of your healing and as you orgasm. State it out loud! “This is for my healing!” Honour what emotions or sensations result from that.

If you are with a partner, you can tell them what you are doing to ensure the space is safe and supported, or keep the intention within. As you orgasm, do the same thing, try to draw that beautiful wave within, feeling it send love to your womb, your body and all the wounded parts of yourself.

6. Cord Cutting and Energy Clearing 

Over time we accumulate the energy of past lovers, experiences and pain in our bodies and especially our womb spaces. You may not realize it, but pain without a medical reason, lack of libido, lack of sensation in your yoni or other sensitive areas and blocked creativity are some signs of trapped or stagnant energy here. If there are energy cords or hooks from other people you may notice it as a loss of energy when thinking of them or talking to them, being unable to let go of the past or holding onto negative emotions associated with that person and/or events.

Clearing the energies of trauma or painful experiences can help increase your connection to your pleasure and your body and support you on your healing journey. This can look like using cleansing tools such as sage, palo santo, blessed water, reiki or herbal smokes on your body, focusing on your womb space and yoni.

Try this: Gather what you will use for cleansing yourself and create a quiet, safe space. (The bathroom with the door locked is a nice place for this if your home lacks privacy).

Center yourself and develop a clear intention of who and or what you want to clear or release. You can stay dressed or remove your clothes. State your intention out loud and with clear authority. For example “I clear the energy of that day from my womb and my body now!”. As you state this intention, begin to use your tool to swipe and clear the energy out and away from your body. Do it wherever you feel it, and remember to use it on your womb space, yoni and inner thighs.

Afterwards check if there is anything remaining. If you have been connecting with your womb, it will tell you, or you may just have a sense of something lingering, so repeat this as necessary. What is important is that you do it with authority. You are the sovereign over your own body and you choose what you will and will not hold any longer in this moment.

There are a multitude of resources out there now and so many amazing people offering womb work, shakti energy activation, kundalini energy work and more. I invite you to explore the topic if you are so drawn to it, as the rise of feminine empowerment continues to build. Working with a womb coach like myself, can assist with this work and tailor the experience to you. I can help you clear energy from your womb space, conduct ceremony for releasing and set up a yoni steaming plan which helps to clear the stored energy of other people and trauma from your body. And as mentioned in the beginning of this series, seek the help of your doctor, counsellor, psychologist or other mental health practitioner if you need it.