I can’t pretend that I am oblivious or impervious to mood changes, ups and downs, or even feeling down at times. Over the years I’ve tried different things to cope and manage and eventually live with more joy. With the overwhelm and isolation that is being experienced amongst so many now more than ever, I’ve also started feeling it. Yesterday I was reflecting on this and instead of trying to push it away, I really let it sink in. Felt the feelings, cried, curled up on the couch with a soft blanket and many cat snuggles, vented with my spouse, and then fell into a fitful sleep, not at all a restful night.

Much of the spiritual work I have been doing lately has had a consistent message about being the light, choosing love and compassion and being open to the broad array of possibilities and perspectives. Key here: being open.

Raising those vibrations, choosing compassion over judgement or hate, giving tender love to oneself and others, even when it feels easier to hide away and be resentful or dissatisfied.  Whatever that is for each of us, and whatever triggers are present, each person has a journey in this life to measure and balance the dark with the light, and every gray scale in between. None of it is wrong and acknowledging what has us feeling low is important.

So, here are 3 ways I uplift, boost and improve my mood when I am having a hard time, the first one, may surprise you.

1.       Acknowledge and express the feelings.

I used to believe this was counter intuitive. If I want to get out of a bad mood, why would I dwell on it? There are times when we just need to move on, yet there are also times when accepting our emotions and allowing ourselves to fully feel it all is necessary. It offers a way of releasing from our body what we often hold in, and to accept all that we are.  

When I started doing ecstatic dance (mostly in the shower) I found a new way to feel and then move the emotions from my body and reconnect to the layers of strength and confidence within. If you have ever read “Pussy, A Reclamation” By Mama Gene, she describes a technique she calls swamping. Basically, she encourages you to act out how you feel in a safe way. Dress like you feel, blast some music that mimics your mood and dance/scream/cry and yell it all out until you feel it released. I can say that this is similar to ecstatic dance or other techniques like intuitive movement. It’s powerful.  

If that doesn’t sound like your thing (though try it, seriously!) some reflection, journaling, couch cuddles with your pets and a sappy movie also work. But don’t dwell or fall down the spiral. Acknowledge it, feel it, express it and then after a time, move on towards something that feels good to remind you of the balance and ebb and flow of life. 

2.       Contact a friend or loved one.

This is simple yet so many of us go weeks without reaching out. Maybe you’re worried about being a bother, are harboring hurt feelings or don’t know what to say. Reach out to someone you care about, say you are thinking of them, ask them how they are, and when they ask how you are, tell the truth. Be honest. They may also need to open up to you, and if so, listen. Or perhaps you just need a quick hello to remind you and them, that we are not alone. 

Maybe meet up and do something together. Try something you don’t normally do; spontaneity is a great way to shake ourselves up and help us to see life from a different perspective, even better when its shared. 

3.       Make one choice that feels good to you and supports your higher self.  Just one.

Over-achievers need not do more than one. Pick one thing that benefits your well-being, health, mental state or pleasure. 

Eat a nutritious meal, do that spiritual practice you have been thinking about but never make the time for. Book an appointment with a healer, counsellor, spiritual worker, body worker, or enroll in that mini course you read about but had excuses not to do. Put on some sexy lighting and music, shut your bedroom door, and show some love to your body with self-massage. Really it doesn’t matter what it is, even small choices can improve your mood. Just choose one and follow through. Show yourself some love and care and maybe next time that dark cloud descends, you will feel differently about how you experience it.

A low mood is one thing we can likely all relate to, but if you’re experiencing a lasting, deep depression I encourage you to seek help from a counsellor, psychologist or health and wellness practitioner while still making the effort to find joy and peace with simple things in this life.